


(At Least) Five Times Soren Told A Joke (And One Time He Didn’t)

by AuKestrel



Category: The Dragon Prince (Cartoon)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Gen, POV Soren (The Dragon Prince), Pre-Canon, Soren Needs a Hug (The Dragon Prince)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:15:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22594645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AuKestrel/pseuds/AuKestrel
Summary: Soren has always taken his job as Claudia's big brother seriously. Well. As seriously as you could expect.Hey, what time is it when people are throwing jelly tarts at your head? Time to duck!
Relationships: Claudia & Soren (The Dragon Prince)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 29
Collections: Chocolate Box - Round 5





	(At Least) Five Times Soren Told A Joke (And One Time He Didn’t)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kuchi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuchi/gifts).



> The prompt said, "I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to see something set when they are children, possibly even snippets through the years, of them being lovably dumb as they are. Anything that will make me sad about the rift between them now lol." 
> 
> Me too. ME TOO.

**At Least Five Times Soren Told A Joke (And One Time He Didn’t)**

“Hey, Mom! Hey, hey, Mom!” Soren skidded to a stop at the kitchen table where his mom was cutting up vegetables.

“Hey, Soren, hey, hey, Sor-bear,” she said, ruffling his hair. “Where’s your sister?”

“Right here,” said a voice from behind them.

Soren swung around and then grinned sheepishly: Claudia wasn’t happy he ran ahead. But it wasn’t his fault his legs were longer. He was two whole years older. He used to get in trouble for carrying her but now that she was four– “She keeps up most of the time!”

“I keep up _all_ of the time,” Claudia said. “I’m not a _baby_ anymore.”

“No, you’re not.”

She sounded sad.

“Hey, Mom!” Soren said. “What did one volcano say to the other?”

“Don’t… don’t explode on me,” Claudia guessed.

“I _lava_ you!” Soren crowed.

Claudia laughed, and then his mom laughed, and then she grabbed them both and hugged them so tight it almost hurt.

Almost.

* * *

Their mom and dad were arguing again. They’d been arguing a lot lately. Claudia cocked her head and a few seconds later Soren heard his dad’s voice get louder, saying their mom’s name: “Tricia, you don’t under _stand_ how important-”

Their mom said something quiet, and their dad’s voice fell too. Claudia sighed. “Mom doesn’t like magic.”

Soren shook his head. He didn’t like magic much either. Well, it wasn’t that interesting. He didn’t have feelings about it one way or the other. But if his mom didn’t like it…

“Dad says I can do magic too,” Claudia said. She looked up at him, pushing her hair out of her face. “Do you think Mom wouldn’t like it?”

Being an older brother was hard. Even his teachers didn’t ask him questions like that. There was no question Claudia could do magic. She was as smart as… she was as smart as _Mom_. But…

“ _Do_ you?”

Claudia never wanted to let anything go.

“Hey, Clauds, what did the asparagus say to the mushroom?”

She was instantly diverted. It always worked.

“I’m… a pear to you?” she tried. “I’m … a sparrow goo?”

“Sparrow goo!” Soren started laughing so hard he almost forgot his joke, and Claudia laughed too.

After they wiped their eyes on their sleeves, Claudia said, “No, really, what? What did the ‘sparagus say to the mushroom?”

“You’re a fun guy!”

Claudia collapsed on the floor, howling. Their mom came upstairs to see what the noise was, and make sure they cleaned their teeth before they went to bed.

She had to come back upstairs after they were in bed, “asleep,” when Soren whispered to Claudia, “What kind of rooms don’t have doors? Mush _rooms_!” and Claudia laughed so hard she tipped herself out of her bed and banged her knee.

* * *

Aunt Sarai was dead, and everyone in the kingdom was sad, even their dad. He walked around with a longer face than normal. Soren tried mud sledding, but it didn’t make their dad happy or mad… just sad. Their mom, though… their mom was… mad? She spent a lot of time stomping, and slamming doors, especially when their dad came home. He wasn’t home very often though. He was spending a lot of time at the palace with Uncle Harrow. Sometimes he took Soren and Claudia to be with Prince Callum, and to rock the baby prince, Ezran, in his little cradle. Claudia watched Ezran, and she was sad too.

“He’ll never know his mom,” she said on the way home, slipping her hand into Soren’s.

Soren hadn’t thought of that. He hadn’t thought past how sad Uncle Harrow was, and how their dad always seemed to be at his side, whispering in his ear. He had thought about Callum, but that’s because Callum was so sad and didn’t try to hide it. He thought about Aunt Amaya, whose eyes were so red he didn’t think she could even see out of them.

But he didn’t think about the little baby prince, and he found his own eyes growing hot and watery.

“Hey, Claudia,” he said, squeezing her hand. “Why-why shouldn’t you tell secrets in a cornfield?”

“Because there’s too many ears,” she said, shaking her head.

Soren grinned. The older she got, the smarter she got. But he had an inexhaustible supply. “What do you call an old snowman?”

“Wait… um… Mr… Mr. Frosty… no, that’s… Snowbeard?”

“Snowbeard, I like that!”

“A… a snold-man. An… an iceberg?”

“Close! _Water_!”

They were both laughing when they opened the door to the kitchen. Their mom was sitting at the kitchen table, her shoulders slumped. So Soren had Claudia tell her the joke and it made their mom smile for a whole ten seconds.

* * *

Soren tiptoed down the stairs, Claudia close behind him. Last night had been one of the worst fights yet. Their mom had yelled and so had their dad. Sometime after the moon set, they’d both gone quiet, but it hadn’t seemed very long at all until the cock was crowing outside their window.

(He liked to climb on the roof of the woodshed so he could see into their bedroom. Soren was looking forward to the day their mom would stew that rooster.)

Since their mom and dad were apparently sleeping – their bedroom door was shut – Soren and Claudia were as quiet as they could be, getting ready for school by themselves. Soren helped Claudia put together lunch buckets, and Claudia helped Soren comb his hair. They sneaked out quietly and closed the door just as quietly.

Soren heaved a sigh of relief. He really hoped their parents would stop fighting soon. Their mom was sad and thin, and their dad seemed to be getting older and… greyer, somehow.

Claudia was trudging along, scuffing her toe and scowling. It was just as rough on her: she used to spend a lot of time with their dad but since Aunt Sarai died their dad didn’t have much time for anyone but the king.

He ruffled her hair. “Why do bees have sticky hair?”

She looked up him, her scowl fading. “Bees – bees don’t have hair,” she started. “They don’t need combs… wait. Bee - _bee_ -cause there’s honey on their pillows?”

“Honey on their pillows!” Soren threw his head back and laughed. “No, because they use honey combs! Hey, what did one glow toad say to the other one?”

“Glow me up!”

“Nice! You glow, girl!”

They kept it up all the way to school, and Claudia was laughing, with pink cheeks, when he dropped her off at her classroom.

* * *

When they got home from school the next day, there was something different. The house seemed empty, somehow. Their dad was sitting at the kitchen table, just like their mom, instead of being at the palace. Their mom wasn’t around. Soren guessed she’d gone to the baker. There was supposed to be a feast for the queen’s birthday. It was something Callum and Uncle Harrow had come up with: Jelly Tart Festival to remember her by.

Claudia surprised him: she went over to their dad and looked at him. He looked back at her, and it was like they were talking with their eyes.

“No,” their dad said, and Claudia shook her head, stamping her foot.

“What?” Soren said, instantly ready to fight for her. “What’s wrong?”

“Your mother decided to leave,” their dad said.

He was fiddling with something in his hand. It looked like some money… maybe Mom really had just gone to get some jelly tarts and Dad was trying to scare them.

“She left early this morning.”

“She… Mom? She… she wouldn’t do that,” Soren said. His stomach felt funny. So did his head.

“No,” Claudia said.

“She wanted you to stay with me. With the king and the princes,” their dad said, looking past them to the window. “She is going back to her family in Del Bar.”

“But we’re her family!” Soren said. “She wouldn’t go without saying goodbye! She would ask me!”

“She told me she asked you,” their dad said. “Last night.”

“She… she asked _me_ ,” Claudia said quietly.

“No!” Soren said. “No! She would have asked _me_! I’m the oldest! I’m the one who has to take care of you!”

“That’s what she said,” Claudia says, her eyes widening. “Are you sure she didn’t talk to you? She said you needed to stay with Dad, to take care of him, and that you would take care of me, and I… I needed to stay with you.”

“ _No_!” Soren howled, sounding just like Prince Ezran, and he ran.

Soren had a hiding place in the stables. It was one of his favorite places because it smelled like hay and horses and it was warm and uncomplicated. Claudia tolerated it but she preferred the library, with their dad, practicing weird incantations like _Htaerb eht laets_ and S _emalf gnippiks gnipael_. It was the only place he could think of to go, betrayal pounding in his ears with every step. His mother wouldn’t have left without asking. She would have said goodbye.

But Claudia sounded so certain.

His dad sounded certain too.

And sad.

They were all sad.

Even his mom. His mom must have been really sad to leave.

At least she got to see us grow up, he thought, and then he sniffled, because Prince Ezran was still never going to know his mom.

“I don’t want this!” he said out loud. One of the horses whickered. But aside from that, Soren was alone.

He racked his brain, trying to remember if he’d talked to her. If he’d had a dream. Maybe he thought it was a dream. Maybe he thought it was a dream and it was really just his mom, explaining and saying goodbye, like his dad said. Like Claudia said.

He fell asleep in the hay.

Claudia and his dad found him late that night and brought him home.

* * *

Things got really different really fast. Soren worked as hard as he played, and he got accepted into the Crownguard Academy a whole year early. He had to move into their dormitory but he didn't really mind. Claudia and his dad were managing great. They were at the castle most of the time, and sometime that year they moved - the king offered, Claudia said, so why not? That meant he and Claudia could eat at the academy mess, which was a good thing: sometimes he was afraid to eat the things Claudia cooked, anyway, with the more magic she learned. He was sure sometimes she’d forget and put sparrow goo in their stew.

Once in a while he remembered a half dream of his mom saying goodbye, that she wanted him to stay with his dad. Once in a while he remembered the jokes he used to tell Claudia. But she didn’t need his jokes any more, and he didn’t need them any more either. He was growing up, he decided. This was what growing up was.

For his next birthday, Uncle Harrow gave him a horse, and Aunt Amaya gave him his first real sword. His dad gave him a book. Even Callum and little Ezran gave him a present. Ezran had made friends with a glow toad and it followed him everywhere, so Ezran and Callum made Soren his own glow toad out of pink and blue clay. He put it on his shelf in his dormitory, where it made him smile every time he looked at it.

Claudia told him she was working on his present and he would have to be patient. So he was patient. So patient he forgot about it until one day, when spring was finally for real and not just pretending to be around the corner. She showed up after his afternoon training was over with a picnic basket.

They went up and up and up a hill far away from the city walls, overlooking the river, and they had a dunch/linner (they always argued about what to call it) that Claudia promised had no sparrow goo, and all the jelly tarts that even Soren could eat. Soren had pretended not to notice that Claudia was awkwardly hiding a wrapped… something. It was long and narrow.

It turned out to be a scabbard. Claudia’s words spilled out: it wasn’t _exactly_ enchanted, and she _promised_ it was safe, and it had some new spells in it, and if she did it right it should keep his sword rust free. “Or it might just keep it oiled,” she said, frowning. “I’m not really sure.”

He thanked her and then they ate some more jelly tarts, and then they both stared at the river for a while. Soren was thinking how he needed to check the girth strap on his saddle when Claudia said, “Hey, Sor-bear.”

“Hey, Clauds,” he responded automatically, like they were seven and five again, and for the first time in years he felt like his heart was lighter.

“What’s brown and sticky?”

“Oh, ugh. Ugh, Claudia, I knew it, I _knew_ there was sparrow goo–”

“Nope!” Her eyes were dancing and he couldn’t help grinning in response. “Try again! Brown and _sticky_!” She waved her fingers in the air and snickered.

“Caterpillar… goo? Uh… saddle oil? Goose…. grease?”

“Hey, Soren, _what’s brown and sticky_?” She was giggling so hard he started to laugh too, even before she said the next words. “A stick. A _stick_.”

“That is the _worst_ joke I have _ever_ heard,” Soren choked out but he couldn’t stop laughing, and neither could Claudia.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks that the disappearance of their mother is suspicious given what we know about Viren and his penchant for a) murder and b) dark magic, and I'm sure it was quite convenient that she "went home" and was never heard from again. (This could be a Columbo episode: "Just one more thing, Mr. Viren...")
> 
> So I was trying to be clever and give their mom the same name as Shou Tucker's wife, but guess what? Mrs. Tucker doesn't rate a name! So she's named after Ed and Al's mother instead.


End file.
